Twelve By Twelve THIS Saturday Night

Saturday, September 26, 2009 starting at 7pm!

Oklahoma Visual Arts Coalition's

12x12 Art Show and Sale

Fred Jones Industries Building

900 W. Main, downtown OKC (view map)

Featuring 150 of Oklahoma's finest artists (including ME),

food from 26 area restaurants,

panoramic views of the OKC skyline (awesome),

live music and cash bar.

It's one fantastic party, not to be missed!

Click Here for More Information. :)

Improve on the Silence

"Before you speak, ask yourself;
is it kind,
is it necessary,
is it true,
does it improve on the silence?" -Sai Baba

Dear happy bloggers and friends of the universe. An awesome friend recently mentioned the above quote of wisdom and I thought it was worth mentioning again. and again. Do you not think it is true that if everyone considered such a thing... if everyone abided by such a suggestion... the world might be a much quieter place?

As a rather opinionated and openly honest person, I need to be reminded of such a philosophy on a regular basis. Does what I say improve on the silence? Hmm... I don't know. Sometimes, alot of the time, probably not... Do any of my ramblings here improve the silence? Perhaps yes. Perhaps no. Perhaps I just don't know.

Today silence seems like a much better idea.

A Sad Day

Tecumseh Building, Tecumseh, OK 2007

Dear friends and readers of my happy blog.

Yesterday a dear friend delivered some unhappy news. One of my buildings was torn down. It is gone now. Room apparently had to made for the new dollar store. Such a store that already exists in duplicate varieties directly across the street. In honor of this building that became a good friend of mine whom I visited often, please allow me to tell you its story - or a section of it from when we first became acquainted.

Tecumseh is not a large town. In fact, it is of the small variety, the kind in which one street takes you through downtown in less than three minutes. It is quaint and charming. a place that you can walk to where you're going. a place where people remember your name. In the several years that we were friends, I did come to adore it so. It still sort of warms my heart, but perhaps now, in a bit of a sad way. for many reasons.

This building, which I called rather blandly "Tecumseh Building" was sort of THE building of Tecumseh for me. the most interesting. the one that caught my eye initially and every single day. In a prominent part of this small town, on the main drag, if you will, it was very forgotten, very ignored. oh so sad, but so incredibly interesting. Coming out of a several year "down" period in my photography, this building was one of the first ones that brought me back. I remember that day so clearly. what music was on the radio, where I had been, where I was going, what I was thinking. It was a Saturday. and thankfully so, because during the weekdays the sad structure was surrounded by cars simply needing a place to park. I was really starting to dig the Holga.

The Tecumseh Building was an old water plant, perhaps the cities first. Shut down forever. Highly ignored and not noticed by the Tecumseh-ians in the city. I admired the character and saw it as clearly standing out from nearly everything else in the city. I printed this photograph and while it was still wet I decided it would get into the Kansas City art show I loved to enter. and so it did. in the summer of 2007. what a summer. that summer my photography breathed a breath of fresh air it desperately needed.

Not every city has such a building. and soon, as the wrecking ball continues its ill-fated course, there are less and less in existence. History gone. Character demolished. replaced by dollar stores and shopping carts. plastic and pavement. Though I never had the chance to actually go in this building, it had the most interesting pipe structure behind it - of which I as never able to properly photograph to justify its coolness. I wonder how many people in the town had ever taken a moment to climb those steps.

The last time I visited Tecumseh, I had camera in hand specifically to revist my old friend, this building. More windows were broken and it was a bit sadder. but it was still strong. still there. hopeful. I wonder how many walls have to be broken down to realize that soon there will be nothing left. I am grateful and pleased for the cities that embrace the old as the new. but even there, casualities still occur. Perhaps they must, to maintain the balance. However, I still do not like it and refuse to like it. ever. Upon my last visit to the Tecumseh Building, I do remember a finality of being there - however, it was due to another reason being in the city again, not in the knowledge that I would never see my building again.

And yes, I talk of these buildings as if they are friends. I visit them often, study their character and beauty, and notice their effect on the world, the world's effect on them. I do not wish to see them reduced to rubble or painted blacktop. In the demise of this building, like several others I have been fortunate to photograph, I am most ardently reminded of one of many reasons I photograph what I photograph. because. now. this building exists only here. in black and white. silver gelatin. Holga magic.

Still. I am sad. and intend on revisiting the site soon. even though such will surely make me sadder.

At the Edge of Almost

It is a new day. Well. Actually, it is the end of today. But. really. each moment is new. New in the possibilities you can choose to create out of it. However, today, as in many days and moments such as this, I find it increasingly difficult to focus. And what is anything without focus? Focus is the key. but it looks as though I've lost my keys. temporarily. I should read about Patience. and what a virtue it is to possess. but I have no desire to do so.

I find "almost" so amazingly frustrating. In itself it is nearly the same thing as "trying" and what is trying? Either do it or don't. But "almost" implies nearly being to the desired goal, it perhaps being just within your grasp. Still. that gap just beyond your fingertips sometimes takes sooo long to close. And so we're back to Patience. Focus. Almost. I'm reminded of an old horoscope that I've saved for far too long for what it tells me...

"Your strategies are very close to working. The results you have generated so far are on the brink of being beautiful and bordering on successful. But it's right here at the edge of almost that your attention is most likely to wander. You may mistake the temporary lull for the absolute end. Please don't give up now. Refuse to be satisfied with your partial victories. Summon the relaxed stamina and ingenious courage to go all the way. Here's a mantra that may help whip up the necessary magic: "Commit random acts of chutzpah." "

For those of you who, like me, didn't know the meaning of chutzpah - my fantastic friend Mr. Merriam Webster defines it as "supreme self-confidence."

So. Chew on that for a while. Good Day happy bloggers of the blogging universe and whoever isn't reading today's random nonsense.

It's a Birthday Party

Good day happy readers.

On this Saturday I am compelled to remind any happy Oklahoma readers - there ARE awesome things to do in Oklahoma. Beyond your daily routine or the average ordinary dinner and a movie at the normal spots.

Tonight, IAO Gallery is celebrating their 30th Birthday with a huge birthday celebration. That's right, Individual Artists of Oklahoma Gallery is having a humongous birthday bash. What? Art. Music. Dancing. Food. Drinks. Good times. Good Company. Turn off your television yo, get up, get out of the house and enjoy this fantastic state we live in.

August 29, 7pm to Midnight. -- at IAO's new location on Film Row at 706 W. Sheridan in Oklahoma City.

Do not tell me there is nothing to do in Oklahoma. Do not tell me Oklahoma is boring. If you think those things you simply DO NOT KNOW and should pay closer attention. What's even cooler about tonight's celebration is that the new IAO gallery is located in the Film Exchange building, another historic part of OKC that is up and coming. Read more about the interesting history of this district here.

Those who focus on what Oklahoma does not have - you are missing the charming awesomeness that we possess on a daily basis with a ease. It makes me sad so many people miss it. Pay attention folks and enjoy here and now.

Good day to you.

Peanut Butter and Jelly

Dear Friends and Readers of the blogging universe.

What a strange, unusual, and busy week it was. at the end of such a week I am left with a mind full to the brim of challenging thoughts and ideas.

I am pleased to report that three of my happy photographs will be showing in 2009 Photo Fest at Paseo Art Space in Oklahoma City. Such news is always reason for celebration. I do adore Paseo. Visiting your friendly art neighborhood is a must. If you are inclined to do so, the opening night of the exhibit is Friday, September, 4, 2009 at 6pm. If you haven't ever been to the Paseo Arts District and you live in or around Oklahoma City, you simply MUST come. It is a whole different world. I love it there. :)

Today I went frame shopping. which is ever so fun. but ever so expensive. and as I'm looking at frames and thinking about my art to go IN the frames, I couldn't keep out of my head a barrage of mixed up thoughts induced by an earlier discussion in the week. I think sometimes I end up seeking out challenges, even unintentionally, as such is what helps me grow as a person, as an artist. But at the same time, in the face of such immediate frustration, I often wonder why I do it to myself. I guess you just truly never know what the outcome will be.

The truth is, I am my own worst critic. Really, I'm not very nice at all. I'm difficult and impossible with extremely high expectations regarding quality. in art. ...in other things, I am a simple girl. a peanut-butter-and-jelly-sandwich type of girl. I mean really, who doesn't like peanut butter and jelly?

I have had discussions with other artists alot about the lack of critiquing once you are out of the classroom. In school, critiques are constant and brutal and a valuable tool. I used to love them. and looked forward to them. I was crazy like that. and then. you graduate and it stops completely. but as an artist, your art doesn't stop (unless you give up that part of yourself which is very sad). So suddenly you are an artist with no feedback. or very little feedback. It used to drive me mad. I needed the critique, or so I thought. but maybe it was like an addiction that when suddenly stopped and I didn't know what to do without it.

More and more and even just this week it was re-emphasized: I don't need. a freakin'. critique. anymore. I'm very sorry, but I don't need your opinion. In fact, I don't really want it. If you like my art, that's grand. If you don't, don't look at it. Good day. I'm not angry, I'm not upset. I do, obviously, hope you like what you see. such is sort of the point, to bring joy, to share a vision of beauty that I see and hope to capture a piece of. but when it comes down to it, an opinion is an opinion is an opinion of someone somewhere. Just as my so called "high standards" is simply my silly personal opinion. someone else will have a completely different view. as they should.

If someone who knows me is actually reading these random words, such is not directed towards any one person or any one situation, please do not take them in a bad way. It is simply stirred up thoughts that probably don't really make any sense at all in the real world.

I wonder sometimes if a consistent involvement in the art environment can sometimes hinder your own artistic vision. Thoughts? Is it possible to be inspired and still somewhat hindered and confused at the same time? Oh I don't know. "Indecision may or may not be my problem."

"Focus on Change... not Results." applying this to my artwork, it reorganizes all the thoughts of what, why, when and what for. because it doesn't matter man. It's just art for arts sake.

Just breath. What will be, will be.

mindless thoughts of no consequence

Summer is closed. Yes, not over, but closed.
As a good book or story that begins and ends and has now been safely returned to the shelf. What an unusual summer it was. One from which I have come away fuller and more complete.

For those of you who know me, as most of you don't, this is a bit more of a personal thought process today. but then again, what isn't personal, after all. It's all personal really. to someone somewhere. to me as my fingers are compelled to uncover and reveal the thoughts filed away in the back of my mind.

Life can change so entirely in a short amount of time that where you are now becomes virtually unrecognizable. People come and people go. and every now and then you wonder if you will ever stop the rotating door of your world. maybe you are the one running in circles through it. But. sometimes it is the falling to the earth with dizziness that makes you feel more grounded and connected to the world than ever before. Being bold is difficult but worth it. Being brave is even harder but most rewarding. People you don't expect to love can creep into your heart suddenly and even without reason. ultimately, life brings you what you need, if you only pay attention and face the sun. Time is precious and hard to hang on to. Datebooks you can scribble in save the world of a silly girl like me. Volunteering in even the tightest schedule is worth it. Even in the darkest person there can be glimmers of light, that you only pray will one day grow brighter. There are children in this world who don't make me fear the future. and they are absolutely mad crazy awesome and smarter than I will ever be. Small victories and big goals for the future are worth celebrating every single day. More importantly than anything else. There are still moments in life that fill my heart with joy and insanely fluttering butterflies.

that's all for now. good day dear readers.